Now is the time when we should have the house impeccably clean, I think. For a first, because I get easily loathed when I see something hard to identify or something that once was fresh. And secondly, because the baby could decide to come any time now. Though my wish to have the house clean is strong, my exhaustion is even stronger. Whenever I get some buzz of energy, I clean around. Surfaces with some food remains are the most disgusting places for me so I try to clean these when I have the most energy because when I have the most energy is the time when I am not fatigued from being exhausted. Dearest Husband helps a lot. He does the cleaning – the nicely done one, and I cannot believe how attuned he had become with my needs. For example, yesterday when I puked heavily, I knew for a fact that there are no clean glasses in the kitchen with thin walls. I hate thick glasses or cups walls – I don’t even know why we have the one that we do. So DH got to the topmost shelf, got the boxed iittala wine glasses with the thinnest walls that we have and purred a cold fresh water so I could swallow the Paracetamol I asked for.
Today the house is again in a mess. I am running the dishwasher, but three key surfaces are still disgusting. The sink in the kitchen, the bathroom sink from the yesterday puking, and the dining table in the living room and the stove surface. A few hours back when I cooked the dinner for when the boys come back, I played The Good Wife on the laptop that I secured on the countertop where I cut all of the necessary ingredients for the dinner, so to get distracted and avoid seeing the mess. The strategy worked, now we have a nice dinner of turkey and rice in soy sauce, yay.
The baby did his morning exercises in front of my language study group, and now is probably asleep. The group I got with at the classes were one Kurdi, one Jemal (not sure where is he from) and one Albanian. I could assume that whatever culture they are coming from practices well covering their women, and there I was, seated next to astonished Jamal who could clearly see the alien in my stomach dancing underneath my tiny tight shirt. We played cards meant for exercising nominative and accusative nouns.
It is time to pick up my son, my back hurts from seating. My head is filled with thoughts staggering in a fog. One day my head will be clear and things will make sense, I hope. Tomorrow is the thirty-second-week exam with the midwife, I am looking forward to that.